


Ghastly is the literal best friend Skulduggery could ask for

by swordfaery



Category: Skulduggery Pleasant - Derek Landy
Genre: Because I love my boys, skulduggery being an idiot as usual, tiny cameo of hopeless
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-09
Updated: 2019-12-09
Packaged: 2021-02-26 22:14:03
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,411
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21736360
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/swordfaery/pseuds/swordfaery
Summary: Just some fluff of Ghastly dealing with his best friends bullshit.
Comments: 5
Kudos: 24
Collections: Skulduggery Pleasant Fic Exchange 2019





	Ghastly is the literal best friend Skulduggery could ask for

**Author's Note:**

  * For [tumbling_into_chaos](https://archiveofourown.org/users/tumbling_into_chaos/gifts).



Ghastly was sound asleep at 4am, like most sensible people were. He'd had a long week full of danger and near death experiences, and when finally he'd returned home all he'd wanted was a hot cup of tea and a long rest.

He got one of those things.

"Ghastly! Ghastly wake up!" stage whispered the dickhead climbing through his bedroom window, making as much noise as it was possible to make, and Ghastly wondered how he could have been naïve enough to think he would get a night of uninterrupted sleep.

"Ghastly what are you doing asleep when there's things to be doing!" Skulduggery (because who else was bad mannered enough to storm through someone's bedroom window at 4am) said, abandoning any pretense at a whisper. "I have a plan and I need your help."

"What." said Ghastly blearily, turning to face his best friend and the cause of all stress in his life.

Skulduggery, who for some reason was wearing some odd balaclava type garment as well as a nightcap, looked at him in surprise. "I told you- some guy disrespected Miriam, so I'm dealing with it." 

"And you need me because..."

"You're my backup for if things go wrong,"

Ghastly got out of bed slowly and made his way over to his extensive wardrobe, if he was going to be killed by gang members he may as well look snazzy.

"Ok so what's happening? Why are you involved?" he called behind him as he chose some armoured but fashionable clothing his father had made with him.

Skulduggery mumbled something Ghastly couldn't quite hear, and Ghastly turned around, hands on his hips to face his friend. Despite wearing pyjamas, Ghastly could look incredibly intimidating when he wanted to, he was a big lad and his scars gave him a hardened look. Even people who knew his gentle nature were often intimidated by him.

"Skulduggery what have you done." said Ghastly, in a voice that sounded terrifyingly like his mother's. Skulduggery looked sheepishly at the floor, and swallowed. Ghastly was reminded of the first time skulduggery had dragged him into something, there had been pirates, it had nearly ended in death. Sure, Ghastly had got a best friend out of it, but the principal of the thing remained. "Start talking, Pleasant." he ordered.

Skulduggery, who had perked up a bit at seeing Ghastly begin to get dressed, looked guilty again. "He asked Miriam on a date," he said gruffly, "so I challenged him to a duel."

"In the middle of the night?"

"Uhh.. yeah?"

Ghastly pinched the bridge of his nose, and groaned. "Who am I fighting?" he said, figuring it would be nice to know which street thug he would be making an enemy of. Hopefully not one of the ones with influence. Ghastly did not want to end up with a gang stalking him every time he left the house.

"Bartholomew, and some of his friends,"

"Bar-fucking-tholomew! Skulduggery he's posher than you! I doubt he knows what a fight is."

"Shut up, Lord Bespoke!" Skulduggery said, in his most indignant voice, which ironically made him sound posher. "Anyway we need to go" 

And that was how Ghastly found himself standing in a cramped dimly lit cobblestone street facing three boys, of which two were dressed almost as ridiculously as Skulduggery. Bartholomew was wearing a very large very ridiculous hat and glasses in a poor attempt to disguise his face, and one of his friends had a very false looking beard on. The third boy was dressed normally, and he and Ghastly gave each other sympathetic glances. 

"So," said Bartholomew, in his ridiculously posh accent. "Pleasant and I shall start, then Bespoke can take over when he dies." 

"You mean one of your idiot friends will take over when you die," shot back Skulduggery, which was the worst witty comeback Ghastly had heard in awhile. 

"Hopefully," said the third boy, and this was apparently hilarious because beardy and Bartholomew both chuckled poshly when he said it, "You'll both die, and I can go back to bed." 

"Are you my soulmate?" asked Ghastly, which made the third boy laugh. 

"Possibly," he said, holding out a hand, "my name is Hopeless." 

"Bespoke," said Ghastly, deciding his new friend could unlock his first name when both their idiot friends had calmed down. 

The two shook hands, and Ghastly was glad he had got out of bed that morning. The next moment Skulduggery and Bartholomew had started awkwardly hitting each other. It was obvious that Skulduggery was better, Ghastly noted with pride, mainly as he had taught Skulduggery how to box. Neither were using magic, either because they had no common sense or because they thought it would be more fun to hit each other, but whichever the morning was turning into a success. 

Then a window above them opened. 

At first, Skulduggery and Bartholomew didn't notice, still hitting each other, but then the voice called out, "What an earth do you think you're doing!" 

It was Miriam

Ghastly groaned inwardly. Miriam would never ever forgive them, and Skulduggery would mope and hit things. 

"Why are you two boys fighting when I'm trying to sleep!"

Skulduggery looked sheepishly at his feet, but Bartholomew, who looked as though he had planned for this exact scenario, pressed his hand to his heart and called up to Miriam. 

"It's because I love you!" 

Miriam looked suitably unimpressed. "If you loved me you would both respect my decisions," and Skulduggery had the decency to look ashamed. "If you loved me you wouldn't stage some macho bullshit fight outside my window!" 

Bartholomew looked a little bit put out at this, but Miriam hadn't finished. 

"And you, Ghastly Bespoke, I thought better of you!" 

Ghastly looked at his feet. 

"You know you can just tell him to piss off," Continued Miriam, pointing at Skulduggery who was displaying incredible restraint not punching Bartholomew. 

"With all due respect, Miriam," said Ghastly, "how well has that worked for you?"

Miriam looked down at Skulduggery, who's restraint had loosened and was now wrestling on the ground with Bartholomew. "Point taken," she said, then "could you please leave me alone now though?" 

After weighing up which would be worse to deal with, grumpy Miriam or mopey Skulduggery, Ghastly threw Skulduggery over his shoulder, said goodbye to Miriam and his new friend Hopeless, and headed down to the pub. They could both do with a drink or two. 

*******************

"I can't believe," slurred Skulduggery, "that she isn't in love with me!" 

Ghastly refrained from mentioning the last four girls that had been in love with Skulduggery until he'd either ruined it by being a prick or gotten them arrested. "Just because she isn't right for you, doesn't mean no one is." he said patiently, and then took a shot. He was too sober to deal with drunk Skulduggery. 

"I'm in love with her!" 

"She's not in love with you!" drunk Ghastly was kind of bitch. "You're not entitled to her!" 

Skulduggery was quiet for a moment, then wrapped his arms around his friend. "Ghastly I fucking love you," he said dropping his head onto Ghastly's shoulder, so Ghastly got a mouthful of curly hair. "You're my best friend, thank you so much for coming out with me tonight."

Ghastly was used to Skulduggery's over affectionate drunkenness, and held him in his arms. "Yeah, well what else would I be doing? Sleeping?" Ghastly laughed. "Nah Skul, I'm always going to be there for you, even if you're being a dick. 

"I'm never a dick! I think you'll find that I am a gift from God!" 

"So can I return you?" Ghastly teased, and then laughed at the indignation on Skulduggery's face. 

The sun was starting to rise, the outside world now a navy blue as opposed to black. The bar tenders switched places, and Ghastly and Skulduggery got pissed. 

"Ghastly," said Skulduggery, doing his best to get to his feet, "I have a genius idea," 

"Is it bed?" said Ghastly, lying on the table in a puddle of beer. 

"No, it's this plan I have to take down a drug ring- you in?"

Ghastly lifted his head out the puddle of beer and looked up at his friend, who was beaming delightedly, albeit slightly drunkenly. "Sure, I suppose bed can wait,"

Being Skulduggery's friend wasn't easy- but Ghastly wouldn't trade him for a full eight hours of sleep, even if sometimes that felt like a more rewarding option.

**Author's Note:**

> Hey, I hope you like this and was what you had in mind, I've been really busy with exams so I wrote this, saved it, and suddenly remembered I needed to submit it at the last possible moment,


End file.
